No Motivation

Mood: Bored/Thinking
In the Background: Wisin Y Yandel Feat Romeo(Aventura) - Noche De Sexo

Thinking About: Me. One thing i have always wanted to do and change about myself was my physique or lack there of. Its is one thing out of many i have always been self conscience about. its is one thing that I'm still the most conscience about. It is one thing about myself that i want to change. I feel if i had the body i wanted i would be so much more confident in myself as a person. I would have a much higher self esteem, a healthier outlook on life..... in other words i would feel and be overall a much greater person. Mentally & Physically. I believe i would feel so much better About ME! And Not To Mention I Would Still Look Damn Good When Im Like 40-50. Still Being Able To Pull Youngin's & Shit. LMAO That would be nice. :) My Problem Is Staying Motivated And Commited To It. I Think i want it but i dont have what it takes to stay with it. I Think I Need Patience & Acceptance. And To Realize that its not gonna come over night. And Try not to look too far down the road trying to see the big picture too quickly. I think im going to try to accept and love myself today and know that each day, im going to get better. I guess thats a way of looking at it. Im Going To try to stay Positve. And Try to keep my self SELF-MOTIVATED. I Want it so bad and i guess thats what i should tell myself when i feel like giving up. I WANT IT SO BAD!

MLB

The Tribe beat the yankees. 12-3 .!!!!!Securing The Lead In The Division Series. Im Hopin These Boys Can Go All The Way This Year. World Series '07! (Favorite Player - Catcher #41 Victor Martinez)

I Feel A Lil Sorry For A-Rod. Sike! That is One Sexy Ass Man Tho. That Man Defines Perfection. In The Dictionary It Would Look Like This

Perfection: per·fec·tion / [per-fek-shuhn]
1.
the state or quality of being or becoming perfect.
2.
the highest degree of proficiency, skill, or excellence, as in some art.
3.
a perfect embodiment or example of something.

4.
a quality, trait, or feature of the highest degree of excellence.
5.
the highest or most nearly perfect degree of a quality or trait.
6.
the act or fact of perfecting.

~~~He's Got It All. Athletic Talent. Check. The Contract. Check. Attractive. Check. The Physique. CHECK CHECK. ASS. TRIPLE CHECK~~~

JUST PERFECT! 20/10.

That Is All.

IT'S ME BITCHES!!!!!!!!!! :)

8888888

Yes! It's Me Bitches! The #1 the only! Its been a while and alot of things have changed for the better. This is one time in life where im kinda content with alot thats going on in my life. Of course theres still many things i havent accomplished and dont have right now, but theres so much i have checked off m list of things to do. for one i came out to my parents. They both know. It was a big hurdle for me to jump over but i did it. my mom still isnt too okay wit it but her ass will get over it as long as im her son. My dad is way cool wit it. I feel like i can confide in him about my relationship. SI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im in a relationship. A relationship that is very important to me. Im in love. I love this person wit all my heart. In the words Of Ashanti "He's Like The Lighter To My Cigarette. Although this is my first relationship, my first love, i feel he is my soulmate. I cant see myself wit no one else. Were like Yin & Yang. I LOVE MY PAPI! LOVE HIM 2 DEATH. MY BABY MY NIGGA MY PAPI. WE DO US!

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Im acing School right now. I Mean its only the 4th week But i Got 3 A's. And Im So Glad. Im Focused Right Now. The only thing lacking is i dont have a J.O.B. right now which sucks. But i hope to find one by the end of this month. Cuz a nigga need money. Wanna Buy my baby sumthin for his Bday 2 Lmao.

As Far as right now life is ok. its actually ok. besides not having a job. Everythings O.k. ...........Yeah everything's O.K.

Some Eye Candy For Those Of Us Who Appreciate Fine Latinos When We See Em

Suave! But He Aint Got Nothin On My Papi! :)

Thoughts....

My friend asked me a really good question the other day, was i still going to go through with my birthday "thing". Thing meaning telling my mother about myself. Coming out. I told her probably so but i wasnt to sure. i just have too much on going on right now and i really havent thought about it as of late seeing as how theres just so much going on right now with school work and trying to keep myself healthy. all of those i am failing at. i have recently started to wonder if school is for me. I mean all i really wanna do is have a good job and make money. im so tired of school and shit. im so stressed out as of late. and most days all i want to do is sleep all day. but back to the main issue of the post. Somedays i just want to tell her and somedays i dont. I mean she probably already knows about me. But i guess i have to actually get comfortable with the idea myself and start loving myself for who i am. just loving me i guess. But its hard feeling like im diffrent from everyone else and not having anyone to turn to or confide in about these issues. Fear of rejection is a big thing and now that i think about i have been rejected my whole entire life.....so why not? I think i will go thru with it. after all i promised myself....

A New Month

Its the 2nd of november and alot of things have happend since the last time i wrote, midterms, getting over people, work, life in general. I Passed my midterm with a C!!!! Boy was i too happy! besides the fact that it seems like im struggling thru schoool[i know im changing my major] and life in general, im surviving. LIFE is still a puzzle to me. I can never just have a clear path of where im going or what i want. Im still trying to find out who i am. The sexuality thing still puzzles me daily. im hoping that this too will one day become clear. Theres like 4 people at work im attracted to. its never a clear thing and ive decided to stop trying to label myself this or that buts its hard being confused and in my head desperately really wanting to know myself.